If you’ve ever met me (or if you’ve read more than three blog posts) you know I want to make good stuff happen. I want to drink green juice, fit in a good workout, write something mind-blowingly good, catch up with friends, sign a new client, meditate, and give a presentation to a group of smart-hearted women.
Preferably in one day.
I’m here to give and give my all. This I know.
There are vistas I want to lay my eyes on, kindred spirits I want to jam with, dreams I crave to achieve. And if I don’t say so myself, I’ve made some kinda awesome events happen in the last few years: a doctorate in psychology, a healed relationship with my body and food, a growing coaching practice and one loving husband!
It’s been busy.
And all the result of a lot of heart, a looooot of hustle (14 hour days, anyone?)
determination and of one metric ton of expectation.
So why do I sometimes feel “meh” about a new coaching project I’m launching, my latest blog post, the prospect of (which should be very exciting) purchasing a home, my bank account balance?
I’ve lost sleep over it.
I prayed.
Bent over backwards in yoga noodling on it.
Sipped (several) glasses of Pinot Noir while pondering it with girlfriends.
Damn it! (Lightbulb)
It’s all that effing expectation.
Expectation has always been an essential ingredient in accomplishment.
Or so I thought.
But lately it mostly feels like a one huge diversion.
A distraction. A weight that I tire of carrying.
I realized, while ‘feet up the wall’ in yoga today, that expectation kidnaps us from the present moment 
. By focusing the bulk on my energy on the expectation of a specific, future outcome I become unavailable to the magic that’s happening right now. I completely skate over it.
I shrink.
Worry.
I calculate.
If I truly want to connect or celebrate the true + actual goodness of what is in front of me then I must surrender stifling expectations.
Determination + creativity are my wing women and they’re here to stay.
Together we radiate love + produce meaningful work.
But expectation? You’ve got to go.
What if we trusted, instead, that our good intentions were supported?
What if we don’t have to ‘go out and get it?’
What if we trusted that the Universe’s desire is that we’re happy and
that everything that would produce that feeling is either here or speeding toward us?
If that were the case, we’d simply need a more prepared vehicle in which to receive.
Our job is to seek within ourselves all the barriers against its coming.
What could it be if I just showed up, did what I loved + dropped the barrier of expectation? What brilliance would arrive at my front door?
Our front door.
I’m willing to give it a shot.
You?
+++++++++++++++
I’m a Los Angeles based love + life coach.
I offer a sharp combination of keen insight, know-how + intuition.
Interested in laser focused one-on-one treatment? Hire me. You won’t regret it.
Dr. Dowling has spent years helping people live richer, more joyful lives. She has seen firsthand the magical pairing of psychology and life coaching, which allows people to access their happiest selves.
View Dr. Dowling's articles on Mindbodygreen
- Maybe I’d be Happier with Someone Else? - Apr 25, 2023
- Mastering An Attitude Of Gratitude & How to Maintain Feeling Grateful - Mar 28, 2023
- How Do I Find Joy in Life? - Feb 24, 2023
Hi,
Thanks for sharing this awesome post. I enjoy it very much and i really appreciate your effort in putting this up.
Im just wondering, do you have daily newsletter where i can signup so i can receive email updates from you?
Thanks,
Veronica