How do I know I’m on the right path?
Asking this question can send us into a knee-bending spiral of:
nail biting
insomnia-inducing
confusion stricken
bleary eyed
unsure-ness.
Been there?
I know I have!
Your head + heart asks: :
How do I know for sure this is the right dream, career choice or partner for me?
Yet, knowing we are on the right path is not nearly as hard as we think.
You know you are on the right path when you are not put in a position to betray yourself. – Caroline Myss
You’re on the right path when:
:: You’re not doing things that make you uncomfortable
:: You’re not saying things you later apologize for
:: You feel your sense of value or worth + see it mirrored back by your environment
:: You’re confident in your choices and life (and aren’t afraid to say so)
These are all telltale signs that you are fulfilling your divine potential in life.
You are on the wrong path when:
:: The situation at hand is costing you your power.
:: You feel drained. Tired is ok. Drained means depleted + that’s a red flag
:: You feel wildly confused about where your life is going
You are especially on the wrong path when you feel like you are “losing yourself.”
to a particular situation. If you find yourself saying “I can’t help feeling like I lost myself” then you’ve
probably betrayed yourself in some way.
Compromise, incidentally, is not betrayal.
Compromise is when you willingly say Alright, I can give here.
But if you’ve compromised to the point where you feel drained or depleted?
Then you have betrayed yourself.
The choices you make in your life will either enhance your spirit
or drain your spirit. What are you choosing?
How often have you said:
“I want to get out of this circumstance but I am too afraid.
I’m just going to slap on a happy face instead”?
Yup, you know it:
betrayal.
People who are in touch with their inner guides can better navigate
around life’s stumbling blocks.
They quit jobs they know aren’t right for them.
They end relationships that aren’t fulfilling.
They make tough choices – because they know they’re the right choices.
Think of every small ‘right’ action as a massive billboard created
for the Universe which says: “I am ready now. I believe.”
The powerful act of staying tuned in + aligned with what is true for you
will create quantum shifts in your reality; your relationships, your confidence
+ energy field.
Some guidance to get you on the right track
:: Don’t be so hard on yourself.
Stop with the self-attack! It’s not productive
Don’t get down on yourself because you ended up on the wrong track – it happens to everyone.
:: Determine + then take the first step.
Change starts with one step. For example: If you were trying to lose weight,
a small first step would be to select whole grain bread
instead of white bread. Cutting down on fats or sweets is also a good first step.
If you’re looking for a special someone, sign up for an online dating site.
Don’t worry about writing your profile or going on dates – your first step is just joining.
Career-wise, spend 20 minutes refreshing your resume.
:: Set a series of small goals.
Don’t bite off more than you can chew. Tiny, doable goals will get you there!
Break down your BIG goals into a series of little, totally doable steps.
Step one: go for a 20 minute walk today. Step two: go for a 20 minute walk and switch
to skim milk in your coffee.
:: Relax more.
It may seem counterproductive to relax, but if this is what you need,
then go ahead and relax for a day or so.
Contemplate how you’ve been living your life, your delayed goals + what
things you want to change about yourself and your life.
Find a serene spot + write down your thoughts and desires in notebook.
Begin by writing down what you need to get, want to give, and what your
deal breakers are in regards to that area of your life. Make this day a mini retreat!
:: Have a mantra or meditation that helps to keep you on focus.
If you tend to be discouraged easily by some things, create a simple mantra
that will help to keep you on target, one that will help you shift
into a more loving and empowered perspective.
:: Accomplish a goal every week, every month and every year.
Enjoy the ‘snowball effect’ of gaining confidence as you accomplish more and more goals!
When you set small, doable goals for yourself, you’ll be that much more likely to take on big ones.
You won’t have to hunt, seek or find ‘the right path.’
Rather, it will rise up below your feet + meet you.
Right where you are.
Now.
That’s.
Magic.
Photo by Mohsen Ben Cheikh on Unsplash
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Dr. Dowling has spent years helping people live richer, more joyful lives. She has seen firsthand the magical pairing of psychology and life coaching, which allows people to access their happiest selves.
View Dr. Dowling's articles on Mindbodygreen
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I have a couple of questions. In your article you briefly state how you can tell when you’re on the right path, and when you’re not: You stated, you’re on the right path when:
• You’re not doing things that make you uncomfortable
• You’re not saying things for which you later apologize
• You feel your sense of value or worth + see it mirrored back by your environment
• You’re confident in your choices and life (and aren’t afraid to say so)
These are all telltale signs that you are fulfilling your divine potential in life.
You also stated that you are on the wrong path when:
• The situation at hand is costing you your power.
• You feel drained. Tired is ok. Drained means depleted + that’s a red flag
• You feel wildly confused about where your life is going
What happens when I find myself answering affirmatively to both? I can say “yes” to the signs in both lists.
My life turned for the worst when I moved in with my brother to help him out financially. It took me a while but I came to realize that he suffers terribly from passive-aggressive behavior disorder, and he didn’t really need the financial help. I was doing really well financially at the time and all he really wanted was for me to share my success with him, which apparently if a very common passive-aggressive trait. PA’s loathe competition, and do not like to see others succeed where they may have failed, especially family members.
However, now my financial fortunes have gone from bad to worse as I have been out of a job for 8 months, I’m broke, and am relying on charity to survive. I have NOT given up and spend 90% of my days searching for work and am in constant communication with recruiters, contractors and potential employers. In fact, I am still quite positive, optimistic and confident that my fortunes will eventually change. I have come across many opportunities, it’s just that none have manifested into a job yet…but I also feel that I’m very close and will find eventual success.
But living here with a terrible passive-aggressive individual has taken its toll…if I had the money a year ago I would have been gone in 5-minutes…but being broke = being trapped, so I’m stuck until I can find that job again.
When that financial help dried up my PA brother basically turned on me, is kicking me while I’m down, and is now moving out leaving me high and dry. This is also typical PA behavior…they never admit that you helped them because they fear showing that they are dependent on anyone, but as soon as you are of no more use to them they go out of their way to punish you (I have done my research).
In recent months I have always just shrugged off his behavior and chuckled. If it wasn’t so sad it can actually be quite amusing watching a grown man behave like an 8-year old. But given my current circumstances it is now becoming quite frustrating and nerve-racking.
So is it possible to be on the right and wrong path? Admittedly I am struggling trying to figure out why I have not been able to find work again…I have never been this stymied before. The work is there..I just have not made it past the interview stage, which is rare for me. Could it be that living in such a negative environment is causing my failure? If so, how?
Thank you.