I love writing lists.
Grocery lists,
Creative writing lists,
Daily “to-do” lists.
I especially fancy writing “desire lists” + I encourage clients to do the same.
“Want more,” I tell them.
Articulate it. Write it down.
Pull it out of your heart + gut and inscribe it on paper or screen.
There is something magical about the organic task of scribing it that makes it just a smidge more real.
Tangible. Possible.
There’s your dream -living + breathing on that piece of paper.
Staring back at you with hope and possibility
Fold it up.
Tuck it away.
Take it out again and there it is winking back at you, as if to say…
“I’m here for the taking – go make it happen. You and me? We’re SO meant to be.”
Make a list of what you desire.
What would be on that list?
More money?
More love?
More time, compassion, freedom, comfort, honesty?
Maybe it would sound like this:
“I want to make more $$$ a month.”
“I want to have more time to spend with my children this summer.”
It’s never, ever wrong to want what you want.
Now, that doesn’t mean you’ll get it, but denying it won’t exactly land you somewhere better. So you might as well embrace it.
But there’s a twist to desire lists.
They can distract us from what’s already working in our life.
And when you take notice of how affluent you already are, you tend to thrive more.
With that being said there’s only one kind of list I like more than a desire list:
A gratitude list.
Gratitude creates more reasons to be grateful.
Planning for love makes you feel lovable.
Aiming for power gets your internal power grid charged up.
And so it goes.
Go through your desire list + next to each want think about where you already have evidence of it in your life.
“I want to earn more $$$ a month.”
Might look like this:
That $197.00 a month cable plan? I probably don’t need it. I’m going to downgrade to the $120 a month plan and that will save me at least $70! I just got money back from income taxes! My friend Charlotte treated for dinner last night and that saved me $40. I started carpooling with my friend Jen and now I save at least $50 of gas a month. My favorite shampoo + conditioner was on sale this weekend! Cha-ching! Those pair of shoes I have my eye on just went on sale for Labor Day – extra money in my wallet!
“I want to spend more time playing with my children this summer.”
Gratitude says:
Every Saturday morning I’m going to let them pick their favorite breakfast + we’ll make it together. Chloe always wants to read with me at night + too often I rush through it because I’m tired…I will make an effort to clean the dinner dishes AFTER I read with her instead of before. That will guarantee me more energy for our time together! That blanket fort I’ve been promising to make them? This Sunday it’s happening! We’ll go camping in the backyard and eat ice cream for dinner on Thursday!
Scour the landscape of your life for proof that your desires are already alive and well or easily encouraged.
Doing so:
:: helps you realize that you are already on your way to abundance!
:: takes the desperate charge out of your goals and desires. Less desperation and more gratitude = more clarity of mind and heart.
The ability to recognize what is already working is power playing. Your ace in the hole. The intention to celebrate not only what you want more of but what you already have is not just where you will be….but who you will be.
Intend well. xo
Photo by Uby Yanes on Unsplash
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Dr. Dowling has spent years helping people live richer, more joyful lives. She has seen firsthand the magical pairing of psychology and life coaching, which allows people to access their happiest selves.
View Dr. Dowling's articles on Mindbodygreen
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- Mastering An Attitude Of Gratitude & How to Maintain Feeling Grateful - Mar 28, 2023
- How Do I Find Joy in Life? - Feb 24, 2023
Great idea, Danielle! I love this idea so much more than just a standard desire list. I’m a huge list-maker myself, so I’ll definitely be incorporating this gratitude strategy into my next list of dreams/goals/wishes. 🙂