You’re Being Polite, Not Weak (knowing the difference)

croissant and coffee on table

When I am being polite,
do not confuse it with weakness.

When I say, “That’s fine, we can do it your way,”
do not confuse it with weakness.

When I proactively choose not to defend myself,
do not confuse it with weakness.

Because we choose not to over-invest in nonsense or someone else’s
narcissism – does not mean we’re rolling over + playing dead.

It does not mean they win + you lose.
You are not, in fact, abandoning your values.
Rather, you’re simply preserving your energy for things that matter.

When you choose to respond with, “Ok,”
rather than creating a situation with someone you don’t hold in high regard anyway
you are not being weak.

You are holding your center.

Consider yourself:
Firm
Focused
Discerning
Composed

Your vantage point is one of observing impersonally rather than taking it personally.
You understand that not everyone + everything
requires a high voltage reaction.

You are being civil.
Not weak.

Justifying it becomes relatively uninteresting.
Unnecessary, even.

There will be moments when self-preservation is called for.
But you will know the difference.

You understand that one does need to be mean to be tough.
And that toughness through civility is far from weakness.

You will encounter people + situations who will try to rattle you.

They will try to make you feel that you are not smart, capable or worthy enough.
They’ll try to imply you don’t know what you’re talking about,
that you’re not really up for the task.
Maybe you should step to the side.

Go ahead.
Politely step to the side.

People who insist on continuously marginalizing others
will leave enough rope to hang themselves.

Let them.

You don’t need anger, cruelty, or snark to prove your point or get the job done.

Be on fire.
Know your rights
+ of course don’t take any shit

But do it with style + resolve.

The world needs your brilliance + composure.
We will look to you for it.

And you’ll be ready for us.

 

+++++++++++++++

I’m a Los Angeles based relationship counselor + life coach.
I offer a sharp combination of keen insight, know-how + intuition.

Interested in laser focused one-on-one treatment?   Hire me.  You won’t regret it

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Comments

  1. Good thing to read today, since I am playing second fiddle to a self-entitled, somewhat narcissistic fellow employee, who simply asserts that they are more hardworking, dominant and ‘in-charge’ before even really proving anything at all.
    My silence or agreeance in order to get the job done for the today is taken as weakness, but it is not. I’m just not going to turn my workplace into a warzone.
    So I will continue to just do my thing, as I have always done, showing employers and customers what I do, rather than just telling them about it.

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